Land of the Free, Home of the . . .

It happens more than I'd like to admit: I'm drunk; I'm at a pub; I'm sitting next to a Welsh person; they proceed to tell me that American football players are delicate flowers for playing with pads. I usually respond by mumbling something about the force of impact being significantly less in rugby where the angles of contact are different and, well, padding really only addresses truly devastating hits and, er, you have to factor in field conditions in North America, and . . . Anyway, inevitably, I end up losing the argument, which brings me to the matter of helmets.

MLB, do me a favor and don't make things worse.

Helmets for coaches? Helmets for coaches in a sport where everyone stands in place until the ball is hit?

Maybe you missed it, but there's a sport they've been playing in Ireland for the last 700 or so years that's like baseball except you can shoulder check the guy who's about to swing at the ball or, if you so please, swing your bat for it at the same time. It's called hurling. Helmets are optional. Let me repeat: in a sport in which you can literally be clubbed in the head with a bat or be hit with a ball traveling at over 90 miles an hour from a distance of a foot, you get to elect whether you wear headgear or not.

Don't mind me. I'll just be having my pint over here in the corner by myself.